Her Royal Shortness
by Gaeri Skywalker
Summary: Han and Leia get in an argument after Han calls Leia short. Not finished yet, hopefully I will get more up soon.


Han Solo was, as usual, busy repairing the _Falcon_. He, Luke, and Chewie had been working non stop all day in complete silence, except for the occasional cough from Luke. Han supposed that whatever exactly was wrong with Luke after Bakura, it was something even crazy Jedi tricks couldn't fix completely. He wasn't sure why he was letting the kid help with the repairs anyway, but even if he would never say it out loud, he needed the help. Everything that had happened since Leia had rescued Han from the carbonite still seemed fresh in his mind. _Luke is her brother_, he thought to himself, still finding the news completely unexpected and almost unbelievable.

"Get down here, flyboy!" Leia called from outside. Han walked swiftly down the ramp to meet her. "Still busy with the scrap pile?" she asked.

"What do you think?" Han asked sarcastically.

"Very funny. What's wrong with the piece of junk this time?"

"Hyperdrive," Han replied.

"Really?" Leia asked, "So what else is new?"

"You know, that was so funny I think I forgot to laugh."

"Seriously, does the hyperdrive on that thing ever work?"

"Yes!"

"When has it worked, on the first try, when we needed it?" Leia questioned.

"Plenty of times. Like, um…when I piloted Luke and that Obi Wan guy to the Alderaan system," he paused, thinking, "You know, this was _not_ included in the job description."

"What?"

"When I agreed to give Luke and Ben passage to the Alderaan system, this whole thing was not in the job description," he said, gesturing to the near empty hangar bay.

Leia stood on her tip toes and kissed his cheek. "Maybe you should consider it a perk." As she turned and walked away Han could have sworn he heard her mumble something about nerfherders.

"What did I do to deserve that?" Han asked, to no one in particular.

Later that night, on the way to Leia's apartment for dinner, Han was still thinking about the whole Luke thing. _Really_, he thought, _the kid can't keep himself out of trouble…first at the Battle of Yavin, then on Hoth—on Hoth…and then Leia, and…Oh get a grip, they didn't know they were related—but really, does that make it any less wrong? Whatever—doesn't matter. But the kid's a walking accident…and Leia's brother_, why did that keep coming up?

He was at the door now, he was late but he was there. He knocked and heard Leia say to come in.

Luke and Leia were sitting on the couch, laughing, when Leia looked up at Han and said, "So you've been working on the _Falcon_ this whole time?"

"Yeah, as a matter of fact."

"You really think you're going to make it work _all the time_ one of these days?"

Han grinned, "Oh, is that a challenge I hear, Princess?"

"You never know," Leia replied. Luke rolled his eyes. _Here they go again…_

"Yeah, well, I've got a challenge for you, Highnessness," Han teased. _I shouldn't have said that…what challenge? Crap…I gotta think of something now…_

"What would that be, nerfherder?"

_Crap, crap, crap…_ "I'll figure it out. Don't worry. Give me a little while."

"Right…you know--"

Luke, sensing another one of their arguments, which he called flirting most of the time, cut her off, saying, "I don't know about you, but I'm starved. Let's eat." It was cheesy, he knew, but it worked.

"Couldn't have said it better myself, kid," Han agreed, then he added, looking at Leia, "But first, I should wash my hands, seeing as they're _DIRTY_."

Leia turned a peculiar shade of red at this comment. Seeing this, Luke asked, "What was that all about?"

"Um…no idea," Leia replied innocently.

After dinner they sat and talked about nothing in particular, Han cracked a few jokes, and all was well, until Leia had to bring up the whole challenge thing again.

"So, flyboy, thought of your challenge yet?"

Han's mind was racing. He hadn't given any thought to the challenge thing, and it had become one of those simple competitive things that meant way too much to him. He _had_ to think of something.

Leia acted impatient. She was enjoying playing stupid games like this. "I'm waiting…"

"I…um…I…yeah, I have."

Leia stood up to pour herself a glass of water. _Force, she's short_, Han thought, and without even realizing what he was saying, blurted, "You need to grow a few inches!"

Turning, puzzled, to face him, Leia said, "What?"

"You heard me, Your Worshipfulness, you're short!"

Leia almost laughed, but kept playing her game with Han and looked outraged. Luke could tell that it was an act, but Han seemed completely fooled.

"S-sorry, Leia," Han stuttered. This was for real, Luke knew, and it was hilarious, though he kept his face serious, eyes darting back and forth between Han and Leia.

"So…you think I'm short? _Short?_ You—you…_NERFHERDER!_"

Han was looking thoroughly confused. "I-I didn't…I wasn't thinking, okay?"

"But it still bothers you that I'm short! Right?"

"It never"

Luke had to intervene—he knew his sister was going to laugh and ruin her own charade in a minute. "Okay. Well, I guess I should be going…Han do you mind if I borrow the _Falcon_ for—"

"You're not touching my ship, kid!"

This time Leia stepped in. "Maybe you should go too, then, Han. Luke could help you with the repairs you'll be working on for the rest of your life."

"Don't insult my ship, Your Royal Shortness! If you weren't a girl, I'd"

"Okay, Han, let's go!" Luke said, practically pushing Han out the door. "Bye, Leia!" He gave Leia a grin before shutting the door behind him.

The moment the door was shut, Leia burst into a fit of laughter.

Luke felt it hard to contain his own laughter as he strolled back to his apartment well past midnight. He had gone to the _Falcon_ with Han and gotten roped into sticking around while Han and Chewie worked on repairs. Han then insisted that Luke play a few games of sabacc. Luke, however, insisted that he was exhausted and needed to go to bed. He finally attempted using the Jedi Mind Trick on Han, resulting in Han figuring out what Luke was trying to do and kicking him out of the _Falcon_. Han had been in an excessively bad mood following the night's events, but Luke didn't want to ruin Leia's fun, so he put up with it. Luke unlocked his door, walked inside, and fell asleep in a chair after less than five minutes.

Wedge Antilles was strolling through the base the next morning, when he heard an unusual amount of shouting coming from the general direction of the hallway where Han and Leia's paths usually crossed in the morning. _Great_, he thought, and proceeded to try to find an alternate route to someplace—anyplace—where he could find breakfast. He had no such luck, so he walked casually down the hallway to where Solo and the princess were having their "discussion."

"Well, if _you_ hadn't insulted _my_ ship, maybe I wouldn't have said anything!" Han was yelling.

"That doesn't give _you_ the right to call _me_ short!" Leia retorted.

Wedge tried to slip casually by. No such luck again. This was not his day. "Hey, Wedge!" Han called, "The princess here seems to think that _my ship_ is piece of junk. What's your opinion?"Han thought, _Antilles, you had better give me the right answer…_

"Do you really want my honest opinion on that, Han?"

"Yeah." _Wedge, I'm gonna kill you!_

"Yeah, I kinda…agree with Leia," Wedge answered, then, seeing the look on Han's face, said, "But the _Falcon_'s got it where it counts, right? Um…I…gotta go!" He turned and fled, not wanting to get caught in the middle of this.

By the end of the week, Han and Leia were not speaking. Luke had no idea what exactly had happened to lead to this, but he was forced to relay messages back and forth between the two of them all the time. Upon his arriving at dinner one night, Luke was approached by Han, who asked him to tell, "Her Shortness," that he was waiting for an apology, and would not stop ignoring her until he got it.

"Don't you think you two are being a little immature about this, Han?" Luke asked, almost flinching as he saw the look on Han's face.

"No, kid, I don't," Han said defensively, sitting down next to Luke. Thirty seconds later, Leia arrived and sat down on the other side of her brother. "Okay, I'm leaving. See ya, kid," Han said, getting up and walking out.

Luke rolled his eyes. This was ridiculous. "Han says he's waiting for an apology."

"You can tell Han that there is no way he's getting one. I'm not speaking to him until he apologizes to me," Leia snapped.

"Hey, Leia, don't you think you and Han are being rather immature about this whole thing?"

"_No!_ I'm being perfectly reasonable, Luke. I'm ignoring the nerfherder because if I didn't I would kill him."

"Seriously, Leia, you're acting like five-year-olds," Luke admitted.

"No, Luke, I'm serious. Can I borrow your lightsaber?"

"NO!" Luke refused. "What did he say to you to make you so upset anyway?"

"He…oh, forget it. I'm not telling you right now," Leia said.

"Why?"

"Because! That's why! Now you go tell General Solo that I'm waiting for his apology," she demanded, getting up and leaving Luke sitting all by himself.


End file.
